Being an artist means revealing one's more vulnerable, deeply personal side. Part of it comes from the artist's need for self-expression. But this need is not completely selfish. Through the artist's experience and ability to translate emotions into their artistic medium, they are enabling their audience to process their own parallel or similar life experiences, relate to them and perhaps even work through emotions that are at times difficult to access, perhaps even acknowledge not to mention deal with.

An artist does that by highlighting their aesthetic aspects, no matter how painful they may be, and showing a larger perspective - such as the symbology of a tragic story. To actually live it or re-live it would be a nightmare. But to read it or watch it on the silver screen may allow us to safely laugh, cry, and re-emerge stronger and perhaps even more resilient.

Perfumery is an art form, although some may argue otherwise.  My own perfumes are a complete expression of an idea, memory or emotion. I pour my heart and soul into creating them, from concept to designing all aspects, including the imagery that may accompany it (such as the postcards I create especially for some of my perfumes), the story behind them or the "ad copy" if you will. And of course sourcing the materials carefully (sometimes growing, foraging and extracting them myself). So much of myself goes into every bottle - my energy and intention, as well as my own personal story. Because most of my perfumes are a chapter in my own life's story. As winding as it may be.

The last perfume I've launched was deeply personal, even more than the others. First of all, I made it for someone very close to me who have since disappeared. It was with a heavy heart that we had to part ways, and now he is lost to me. I was debating for the longest time if to launch this perfume or not. In hindsight, I feel this was a mistake. Because not only was it not well-received (which I can deal with,  but it was even ridiculed. Or at least the story that I shared about it on SmellyBlog was. I wasn't counting on this to be a blockbuster, but I did want to share my story and love the scent very much. And very few bothered to actually try it (because I guess my personal story, as interesting as it is to me, wasn't appealing to them).

For whatever that is worth, I wanted to share with you these feelings I have about launching new perfumes and pouring my heart here or encasing them in flacons for that matter. I feel that I grow more and more distant from the perfume as an "industry" and want to fully express my potential as a human, a scent-artist, and do it freely. It does require courage. But apparently right now I don't have that courage. I want to learn, create and share with those who appreciate it. I am no longer in that phase of life when I feel the urgency to prove myself or my talent; this desire has long been replaced by the need of authenticity in all that I do: research, teaching, incense and perfume making, as well as blogging.

Here's a handful of shaped and rolled nerikoh - incense balls from a Saturn planetary blend. The last one to complete my series of Planetary Incense Pastilles. It was a long journey to get to this point, so let me share the steps with you. Unbeknownst to you, I hav been working on a series of incense pastilles for the Seven Ancient Planets. It all went swimmingly well (not counting the years of trial and error prior to that, which began in 2001 when I first tried to make such pastilles, and abandoned it pretty quickly to move onto making the perfumes you've been enjoying all these years).

When I came to compounding the incense for Saturn, I got stuck. I went back to some of the ingredients I've used originally, and that are associated with Saturn: Myrrh, cassia, patchouli, vetiver, cedar and cypress. I changed the formulation to make it a little less harsh. Also I had actual Arizona cypress, which smells amazing - both leaves and twigs - added to this blend, rather than cypress essential oil which I used in the original formula. I was rather happy with the smell albeit it dry and bitter/acrid character (which is rather typical to Saturn energy). However, there was one problem: despite the large amount of resin, these did not form into pastilles when alcohol was added. I really did not want to turn these into incense cones. After consulting some of my incense friends, they've advised me to turn these into Nerikoh, which are Japanese incense pastilles. These are made with any compounded fragrant woods, spices and resins but are glued together with sweet sticky materials such as plums or honey.



I made a tiny experiment with just one ball of Nerikoh before leaving for my trip to Canada. It worked well, and didn't get super hard, even though I added some makko powder prior (with the thought of turning this into incense cones). Adding honey to my Saturn planetary incense blend on Rosh Hashanah seems very appropriate. And this is what I did on Rosh Hashanah even. Of course, I added too much honey, so I left it to dry for a few days... In the above photo you can see the first step in making Nerikoh. It looks and feels very much like baking - but smells quite different!


Now the honey is all mixed in to form a dough. This has a very sticky consistency, not unlike the  honey cookies I make every year for Rosh Hashanah!


Shaping the nerikoh begins with making a "pitta" from the sticky "dough" and scoring it into stripes and then further cutting into small tiny squares. From these we'll make little balls, as close in size as possible. The tricky part is that it's a very sticky dough! A little like making honey cookies for Rosh HaShanah. Of course, if your mass is less sticky than the one I made, it would be easier. I also imagine that having a better surface would also help. I imagine a granite or marble surface would be better than the screechy stainless steel I have here. Although it does work quite okay.



Forming the nerikoh dough into tiny balls. A little like making minature chocolate truffles... But way stickier! I used extra powder of sandalwood to avoid stickiness. And even then I had to go over the balls several times in the following days because they kept sticking together. Blame it on humidity. Oh, and the overdose of honey which obviously haven't dried out quite well yet.


Nerikoh is ready... Almost. Needs to be cured for 6 months though before it is properly dried and develops its full character. And then it can be warmed on a micah plate atop charcoal buried in ash to fully enjoy its aroma. This can be also done with an incense heater, or even an aromatherapy diffuser (a little bowl set above a tea light).